V Series 2 on SyFy

26 Mar


V Series 2

So, it’s the first week of my New Billboard Day challenge and we’re off to a flyer with Series 2 of a sci-fi show noone’s ever heard of: V.

To be honest, try as I might I’ve never been much of a sci-fi fan.  Whilst I did enjoy and can appreciate elements of the Star Wars franchise, I’ve personally always found the whole series to be a little overrated and would genuinely rather eat my own sick than watch any series of Star Trek (The Next Generation, Deep Space 9, Babylon Zoo or other).  So, it was with a little excitement and a lot of trepidation that I woke up on Monday to find a hot alien staring at me from the billboard opposite my kitchen window.

First thoughts on the billboard?  Clearly if you’re a fan of the first series, this poster is going to get you excited.  The coquette in the picture shows her alluring smile whilst holding a baby whith a green tale poking out.  Based on the caption “The Battle Is Born,” I can only assume this baby is a new addition for series 2 which doesn’t bode well.  Can anybody name a film or TV show where the adding of offspring has resulted in an improvement?  Personally I’ve always found the adding of offspring to a film or TV show to suggest the writers have run out of ideas. Little Fockers, Son of the Mask, Indiana Jones: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull… These are just 3 that come to mind instantly.

So, how about the show itself?  Well, after spending about 5mins actually trying to find the SyFy Channel which I never even knew I subscribed to, Mr. Voiceover Man welcomed me by saying “Remember when the sky went red and we were left with the cruellest of cliffhangers?”  This didn’t bode well.  30 seconds later and I tried my best to keep up with conversations about “The Fifth Column” and “Visitors” without much luck.  An hour later and I still wasn’t entirely sure what The Fifth Column even was.

Having said that, the show was actually pretty entertaining.  Melting faces, softcore porn, raining blood… they’re all there!  It transpires that the woman in the ad is called Anna, Queen of the Visitors and she is one evil bitch who will kill her own offspring and henchmen to ensure her plan goes ahead without a hitch.  What that plan is though…?  We’re not quite sure.  The hunch from our protagnists is that the Visitors are intending to reproduce with humans, aptly put by one of the characters as “So first they want to invade us, then they want to shag us.”

Which brings us to our heroes, a motley crew of horror/sci-fi clichés. You have the aforementioned ‘Joker of the Pack’ – a beardy Aussie who’s armed with deadly pecs and even deadlier one-liners such as “If you say no, we’ll kill you.”  ‘The Inside Man,’ a Visitor who’s green tadpole-esque baby we saw in the poster has been kidnapped by Anna and who’ll stop at nothing to get her back.  ‘Action Chick,’ our main protagonist who works for the FBI and is not only hot but also doesn’t take shit from anyone, plus acts more masculine than our newest recruit – ‘The Nerdy Scientist’ who can help solve the mysteries surrounding the Visitors.

Despite having very little idea what was going on, I didn’t hate V.  The special effects were cool, the women were hot, the acting was mediocre.  Having said that, in terms of storyline nothing really happened and the introduction of Anna’s (not unattractive) mother at the end of the episode wasn’t quite the cliffhanger ending I was hoping for.  I’m willing to give it another chance until the next New Billboard Day, but whether this can turn into the next Lost or The Wire remains to be seen. 

I’m not confident.


6 Responses to “V Series 2 on SyFy”

  1. alannah March 29, 2011 at 3:15 pm #


    This is great!

    So are you saying that if next incharge we post a brand new audi up there or a new line of lingerie we can be assured you will be driving/ wearing the relevant brand into work?

    This could be interesting.

    • billiethesquid March 29, 2011 at 4:03 pm #

      That is exactly what I’m saying!

      Whilst I wouldn’t buy a new Audi, I would certainly book a test drive with my local dealer and review it that way. It’s all about ‘experiencing’ what the billboard is promoting. Clothes is absolutely fine, whether for man, woman or child I’ll give it a go.

      If you could please avoid any ads for the Army it would be massively appreciated x

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